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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27683209">i like ghosts. (i want to be one someday)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ariaizz/pseuds/Ariaizz'>Ariaizz</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>mcyt has taken over my life [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>AGAIN IS THERE A TAG OF PHIL KILLING TOMMY????, Amnesiac Ghost Wilbur Soot, Angry TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Angst, Author Projecting onto TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Author Projecting onto Wilbur Soot, Author is a TommyInnit Apologist (Video Blogging RPF), Bad Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Betrayed TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, Clay | Dream Beats TommyInnit to Death (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream Kills TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Crying TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Dave | Technoblade and Wilbur Soot and TommyInnit are Siblings, Dead Toby Smith | Tubbo, Dead TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Dead Wilbur Soot, Depressed TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Domestic Fluff, Drabbles, Dying TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Evil Wilbur Soot, Exiled TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Flowers, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Ghost Jschlatt (Video Blogging RPF), Ghost TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Ghost Wilbur Soot, Ghost Wilbur Soot Tries, Ghostbur, Hes baby, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Insane Wilbur Soot, Language of Flowers, Lonely TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Lowercase, Other, PLEASE IM SO HAPPY I CAN ADD THOSE TAGS NOW, Pain, Phil Watson Hears Voices (Video Blogging RPF), Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Platonic Relationships, Poor TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Resurrected Wilbur Soot, Sad TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Sad and Angry TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Sleep Deprived TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Suicidal Thoughts, Suicidal TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Surprisingly, Technoblade Hears Voices (Video Blogging RPF), Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit Angst, Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit Friendship, Toby Smith | Tubbo Misses TommyInnit, TommyInnit Angst (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Deserves Better (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Gets a Hug (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Has PTSD (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Hears Voices (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Needs a Break (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Needs a Hug (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit is Not Okay (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Traumatized TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot Hears Voices, Wilbur Soot and TommyInnit are Siblings, Younger Sibling TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Youngest TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), angst does that, as you can see im legit looking through every single tommy and wilbur tag including the obsure ones, i like to bully tommy in these jesus, i say that then put him through hell, i would say that im a wilbur apologist but then the void happened, lmao is there a tag of tubbo killing tommy???, oh yeah forgot this, oneshots, please help me, these drabbles are very dark, theyre short but causes pain, tommy dies a lot</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-05-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-09 02:40:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,922</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27683209</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ariaizz/pseuds/Ariaizz</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>tommy is really tired</p><p>~~~</p><p>aka a bunch of sbi drabbles that are mostly tommy centered angst</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dave | Technoblade &amp; Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; Wilbur Soot &amp; TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson, Dave | Technoblade &amp; TommyInnit, Dave | Technoblade &amp; Wilbur Soot &amp; TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson, No Romantic Relationship(s), Ranboo &amp; Toby Smith | Tubbo, Ranboo &amp; Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit, Ranboo &amp; TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit, Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson, TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot &amp; TommyInnit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>mcyt has taken over my life [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2007133</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>92</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>1114</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. outcast</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>i</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>tommy was always cast aside, set as a toy that people played with then left for somebody else. he wasn't on good terms with the rest of sleepy bois inc in smpearth, and he wasn't now. everybody wanted anarchy and wilbur's fucking dead. even if he was alive he still didn't agree with him. he was alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>tommyinnit didn't like being alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>sure, he has tubbo, but he's always busy with paperwork from becoming president. he can't blame him, though since if he was in the same spot as him, he would do the same thing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>everyone else he either disagreed with them, didn't like them, or wasn't the closest with. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>tommyinnit was always a fucking outcast and he hated it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>he used his normal annoying antics to try and get someone to side with him, but of course, it didn't work- why would it?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>but... that was the only thing he knew how to do, other than stay secluded in the corner of a room and cry like a bitch. that and cling to others.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>three deaths till perma-death, huh? he's on his second.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>another grave sounds good right about now.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. whatever you do</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>heard</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>whatever you do, don't imagine everyone grieving tommy's death because it was getting to him and the fear of war got to him and he finalized his permadeath</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>whatever you do, don't imagine wilbur panicking because he blames it all on himself, even though he doesn't remember what he did</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>whatever you do, don't imagine ghost tommy appearing the next day, leaning on his grave and crying because he learned so much and wished he didn't remember anything</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>whatever you do, don't imagine phil, techno, and tubbo talking to tommy about what happened and let him vent</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. red</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>there</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"red is a good color on you toms."<br/>
"you- you fucking crazy bastard-"<br/>
he takes out a multitool with a sharp knife; the same one tommy gave him.<br/>
“how about i make it brighter?”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. no war, only big men and discs</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>was</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>based on something i saw while watching wil</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. tired</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>a</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"wil... wil i'm really fucking tired."</p><p>"go to sleep then."</p><p>"'i'm not tired in that way, wil. i'm just... mentally fucking exhausted" </p><p>"tommy... penny for your thoughts? i-i know i can't remember anything, but.. i want to come in use for once."</p><p>"i'm not going to say much, but.. i'm tired. i want to relax without the fear over another war, or-or dying- or betrayal. i'm on my last life wil. i can drop dead whenever. i've already cheat the system so much. i just want to be a kid again-" </p><p>he sighs. "i know i joke about being an adult, or a big man, or being mature- but that's all just a fucking mask, man. that's just me trying to accept that i'm maturing too fast. i just want to be a 16-year old that can hang out with friends, and be an idiot with little to no consequence, not be a 16-year old that has to constantly fear that his life is going to fucking end, or that another war is going to start.."</p><p>he begins to tear up. "people forget that i'm the youngest. by what? 4 months? both me and tubbo man. we've been through some shit. i want a break. i want to rest."</p><p>"rest, then. i know, i'm a ghost, and i can't do much. in all honesty, i'm also suffering and miserable. but.. but i want to try and protect you. i don't know what past me has done, but i know that it's not anything good. i want to try and do what past wilbur couldn't. the first step might as well be comforting my little brother."</p><p>"thanks.. thanks a lot, i mean it"</p><p>"anytime."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. kill me phil</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>special</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>au where tommy went corrupt instead of wil, but the same events play out</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"kill me phil"<br/>
"...what?"<br/>
"fucking kill me"<br/>
"you’re- you’re my son-"<br/>
"it's a simple request. kill me. do it."<br/>
he hands the sword with steady hands into hesitant shaking ones.<br/>
"i’m tired of this shit phil, fucking kill me. it's going to be good riddance. i’ve already done my bit"<br/>
"...tommy."<br/>
"just do it. there’s no need to postpone this.  i’m not a hero and i never wanted to be, so fucking kill the villain in this story, the good guys always win, right?"<br/>
he was embraced by his father one last time.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. break</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>place</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>oh wow no tommy death in this one</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"tubbo... promise you won't leave me...?"<br/>
"hmm? yeah of course big man! why are you asking so suddenly though- it's not like you to suddenly be so sappy."<br/>
"it's nothing- i just have no one to trust but you. everyone else is either a traitor or dead. it's a miracle i'm still standing, and still mentally there. mostly."<br/>
tommy laughs. it’s obviously fake. so is the smile on his face- and his demeanor- and a lot of things. tubbo has only just noticed.<br/>
"can't really be there fully after you've been in countless wars, and lost everything in so many ways and so many times. and have countless scars- mentally and physically."<br/>
tommy sets the disc on the jukebox and leans into the bench he’s rebuilt countless times.<br/>
"it's pathetic really."<br/>
"we've both been through a lot, tommy. it's not you're fault that it's like this. it should be calm for a while unless phil and techno riot."<br/>
"yeah. i need a break. we all do, really."<br/>
tubbo is silent for a moment.<br/>
"yeah, we do."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. sixteen</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>where</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>tommy hates the number sixteen.<br/>
october sixteenth is when tubbo’s execution took place.<br/>
november sixteenth is when the final war took place, wilbur died, and techno betrayed them.<br/>
tommy was sixteen when his life went to shit, just because wilbur wanted to sell some drugs.<br/>
tommy was sixteen when he had to fear for his life daily, and partook in more wars than anyone should.<br/>
tommy was sixteen the first time he died.<br/>
tubbo was sixteen when he went through similar things as tommy.</p><p>tommy hates the number sixteen.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. first choice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>men</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>tommy wasn't a first choice.<br/>
he didn't mind<br/>
why complain when there's plenty of other useful people; people so much better than a loud, annoying clingy kid?<br/>
why complain when he'd do anything to protect those people because he's loyal?<br/>
why complain when he wasn't his own first choice?<br/>
sure, he was skilled at some things, but there was always someone who excelled at anything he was good at.<br/>
he was only good for helping around a little here and there, not fill an entire role.<br/>
(he did wish he'd be noticed by his family more though. he hasn't heard his dad say he's proud of him in a while. he can't blame him though, since he wasn't proud of himself, either.)<br/>
he loves l'manburg and would do anything to protect it, and protect the people who were a part of it- even if that means sacrificing his last life.<br/>
he loves l'manburg because it was such a big thing everyone worked on, even going to war to help it grow.<br/>
he loves l'manburg because it's his home.<br/>
but he knows it doesn't love him back.<br/>
he couldn't blame them.<br/>
he wasn't the first choice to anyone; not even himself.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. chirp</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>could</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>tommy dangling his feet, the warmth surrounding him and down below being the only thing he felt. he lost his emotions a long while ago and he barely felt the rocks he was sitting on, having been there for so long. chirp plays innocently, not knowing what the boy was about to do. it didn't know that the boy was thinking about death; something that the song reminded him of. it doesn't know, it's not alive. it's merely a disc and a jukebox. some wood and engraved plastic.<br/>
the empty boy slips off into the molten lava, chirp continuing to play innocently, unknowing of what happened. it simply continued its job. and it did it well.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. things i rememeber by ghostinnit</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>go</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em> (Page 1) </em>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p>things i remember</p><p>By ghostinnit</p>
<hr/><p> </p><p><em> (Page</em> <em> 2)</em></p><p>- a big building with a lot of kids</p><p>- lava</p><p>- explosions</p><p>- the final control room</p><p>- logstedshire</p><p>- pogtopia</p><p>- getting stuck in pistons</p><p>- a tall tower</p><p>- getting shot</p><p>- the feeling of exhaustion</p><p>- crying</p><p>
  <em> (Page 3) </em>
</p><p>- loneliness</p><p>- discs</p><p>- the sound of chirp (reminds me of death)</p><p>- a party</p><p>- blue(?)</p><p>- a green man</p><p>- ranboo being there for me</p><p>- the nether</p><p>- getting stabbed by tubbo</p><p>- pleading</p><p>
  <em> (Page 4) </em>
</p><p>- someone going insane and blowing up manburg (and hurting me somehow)</p><p>- withers</p><p>- fireworks</p><p>- (l')manburg</p><p>- losing my mind</p><p>- it being too much</p><p>- breakdowns</p><p>-.- / --</p><p>- i feel so lost</p><p>
  <em> (Page 5) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (Page 6) </em>
</p><p>- tubbo(?)</p><p>- ghostbur</p><p>- ranboo(?)</p><p>- phil</p><p>- techno</p><p>- schlatt</p><p>- everyone who hurt me</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. corrupt</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>emancipate</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>a prideful president goes insane<br/>a father's friend wreaks havoc<br/>a pacifist follows a dictator's footsteps<br/>an irrational kid falls silent and cries quiet pleas<br/>a father of 3 watches his family fall apart, having stabbed one of his own</p><p>what the fuck is the deal with people going corrupt around here?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. yellow</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>the</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>this one is kinda old</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>ranboo walks into tubbo's office casually.</p><p>"hey pres, you have something. i was told not to look in it, since i found it randomly but, um, yeah." tubbo looks up at him and lies down his pen, sighing.</p><p>"anything to get me away from this paperwork." he stood and followed the enderman hybrid.</p><p>he sees a chest with a sign saying "for tubbo", inside there are two items. a book, and yellow dye. he decides to read the book first.</p><p>
  <em>"hey, tubbo! you've seemed a bit sad but hey, have some yellow to cheer you up! it's supposed to give you happiness.</em><br/>
<em>-tommyinnit "</em>
</p><p><br/>
he picks up the dye, seeing that it's been renamed to "tommy's yellow."</p><p>surely-</p><p>he's exiled how did he get this here? dream wouldn't allow it and ghostbur has been busy, as for everyone else...<br/>
he was oblivious to the sad, tired fire spirit silently watching.</p><p>tubbo wasn't one to get emotional, but fuck he'd be lying if he hadn't started tearing up. the only answer was that.. tommy was dead.<br/>
he heard a shuffle and quickly looked around to where he heard the noise, seeing tommy- or more so ghostInnit moving and getting caught red-handed.</p><p><br/>
"tommy?"</p><p><br/>
"i'm sorry"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. panic</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>the</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>tommy and tubbo were sitting on the bench, one of the very few things that made it through... the explosions and withers. chirp was playing in the jukebox; borderline mockingly. it was a somewhat awkward silence between the two. so much has happened in the span of 2 to 3 days; fuck it the whole month, they haven't had any chance to let their minds catch up.<br/>tommy was the one to break the silence.<br/>"dream won't stop at anything to get what he wants." <br/>"hm?"<br/>"dream won't stop at anything to get what he wants."<br/>the silence was a cue to elaborate.<br/>"he- he will manipulate, he will destroy, he will kill just to get what he fucking wants. i know from experience; he doesn't have friends he just has acquaintances if even that, i wasn't his friend-" he hesitates, then he rambles.<br/>"i don't- i just want the fucking discs and a place i can call home- i- i never wanted to have wars, i just- at any minor inconvenience i just fuck up something because i panic"<br/>"-my"<br/>"and i end up starting the war because i'm so fucking impulsive and i don't have any actual skills, and i'm so slow to realize things"<br/>"-mmy"<br/>"and that's how i ended up getting exiled and manipulated and gaslighted. <br/>"tommy-"<br/>"and- and i don't want to be manipulated again, please not again, i don't- i'm sorry- i'm so fucking-"<br/>"TOMMY!"<br/>tommy looks up at tubbo, from the sudden shout. his cheeks are wet- why are they wet? he must've been crying.<br/>"tommy, breathe."<br/>tommy leans on tubbo, tired and more vulnerable from the sudden breakdown.<br/>tubbo doesn't comment on it when tommy falls asleep on him. and neither does quackity, ghostbur, or jack when they walk by.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. home</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>brutality</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>surprise you get fluff</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"tubbo i realized something"<br/>"what is it?"<br/>"i just wanted home. I thought it was l'manburg... but it wasn't. i found home, tubbo"<br/>"where is it?"<br/>"as fuckin sappy as this sounds, it's you."<br/>"that's.. strangely comforting"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. lost</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>and</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>if you were to ask tommy a year ago "who are you" he'd probably respond with something along the lines of "the great tommyinnit, the biggest man of them all" or some cocky bullshit like that.</p><p>if you were to ask tommy now "who are you" he'd give a look that's both lost and as if the answer was blatantly obvious. he'd give a pitiful smile, and an even sadder laugh and say "no one. not anymore at least." and he'd walk away, his dead older brother's jacket trailing behind him, with him adjusting the flower crown of a dead friend as if he didn't just show his large trophy case of trauma and scars in 6 words.</p><p>he ended up gaining the nickname "the lost boy" in the new village he was in. better than thesus in his whole-hearted opinion. not that it matters.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. voices</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>the</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>they all had voices.</p><p>philza was like a father. he got help.</p><p>techno was like a friend. he got help.</p><p>wilbur was like a son. he got help, even if it went in vain.</p><p>tommy was like an annoying pest. he never got help, even though he needed it.</p><p> </p><p>tubbo never had voices.</p><p>tubbo was like a friend. he got help, even if he never needed it. (he did.)</p><p>tommy was like a little brother. he got help, even if it wasn't the best. (it did the job.)</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. blade</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>tyranny</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>techno centered this time</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>when techno lost his twin, it hurt. he grieved, took out his anger on everyone- mainly to tommy through withers, and left to retirement in a nice cabin. he was stressed, but phil calmed him when it was especially bad.</p><p> </p><p>his durability went down, but that's okay, he had mending.</p><p> </p><p>when techno was betrayed by his little brother, he once again took out his anger on everyone. mainly tommy. the voices called for blood, and so he listened, by unleashing more withers than before and blowing the corrupt government to nothingness. he didn't particularly like dream, but he also had phil to calm him down.</p><p> </p><p>his durability stayed the same. it did go down, but he went exp farming.</p><p> </p><p>when techno gained his twin again, he was satisfied. he wouldn't say happy, since he hasn't felt that since before the voices, but satisfied. as long as he didn't make another government, he'd welcome him with open arms. if he hated him, that's fine too. he understands.</p><p> </p><p>his durability went higher. it still wasn't completely perfect, but he did more exp farming.</p><p> </p><p>when techno found out he lost his little brother, he was devastated. the most out of all of them in the family. wilbur was sad, terribly so, but he was expecting it at some point. phil was sad, but he didn't particularly care. he didn't know him well enough to grieve. tubbo was also terribly sad, but like wilbur, he expected it. he knows tommy accepted death with open arms. techno was the only one in the dark. he expected better than his theseus to give up. he used to be the most apathetic. he's now the most sympathetic. funny how that is. the voices <em>screamed</em> for blood. he couldn't give.</p><p> </p><p>his durability went to 0. the blade broke, no more exp to help mend it back together. it could be replaced, but it wouldn't be the same. it never would be.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. smiles</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>of</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"happy birthday phil!"<br/>
techno had a smile on his face<br/>
phil had a smile on his face</p><p>life was good</p><p>"why don't you see him in hell then."<br/>
dream had a smile on his face<br/>
tommy was crying, pleading for it to stop</p><p>life wasn't great</p><p>"welcome to the void tommy."<br/>
wilbur had a smile on his face<br/>
tommy had a smile on his face</p><p>death was nice</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. flowers</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>their</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>the ghost of tommy threads together a flower crown. where he got the flowers is a mystery. <br/>it was made of the primary colors. red, yellow, and blue. <br/>there were begonias, poppies, and crimson roses. signifying dark thoughts, consolation, and mourning.<br/>there were coreopsis, tansy, and butterfly weeds. signifying cheerfulness, war, and a plea to be let free.<br/>there were borages and forget-me-nots. signifying bluntness, and an ask to not be forgotten.</p><p>the crown was hung on the dirt hut. </p><p>the ghost was never to be seen again.</p><p>if only any of them cared enough to look up the meanings.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. replacement</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>rulers</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>tommy knew not many people liked him. he could list them off on one hand.<br/>sam<br/>puffy<br/>tubbo<br/>ranboo<br/>and wilbur if he was still alive.<br/>he knew that he was like an old toy that a child didn't like anymore because they got a new one. better in every way.<br/>tubbo replaced him with ranboo while he was in prison.<br/>thats okay.</p><p>even if he has to die in the prison, scared, alone, forgotten, slowly, painfully, and in a fucking god-awful small box.<br/>thats okay.</p><p>because tubbo is happy.</p><p>he couldn't ask for more.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. pain</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>rulers</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>the thing about pain is that it's always one of two things</p><p>it's sometimes instantaneous and feels terrible  in the moment, but it fades just as quickly as it happens</p><p>and other times it blooms and lingers, usually in the form of purple, blue, green, and yellow splotches. sometimes in red skin. but it always fades, it just takes time.</p><p>tommy is in pain. and it's been lingering for quite a while. 126 days to be exact.</p><p>he thinks that he'll probably need to visit a doctor soon.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. star</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>well</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>tommyinnit is like a star. </p><p>bright.<br/>very<br/>very<br/>bright.</p><p>and when he died he was expected to go out with a bang.</p><p> </p><p>tommyinnit is like a unnovae</p><p> </p><p>bright.<br/>very<br/>very<br/>bright.</p><p>brightest before death, then collapsing into a black hole, sucking in light.</p><p> </p><p>he was healing, y'know?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0024"><h2>24. theseus</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>this</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"do you want to be a hero tommy? then die like one."<br/><br/></p><p>techno unleashed the withers.</p><p>and there was a maniacal giggle coming from the youngest.</p><p> </p><p>"then be the lycomedes to my theseus, techno!"</p><p> </p><p>this caused techno to stagger and falter.</p><p>his theseus talk was a threat, not an invite.</p><p> </p><p>"be my lycomedes or i'll become icarus and fly too close to the sun thanks to my own stupidity!"</p><p> </p><p>techno doesn't listen. he's too stubborn to. </p><p>(and he doesn't want another dead family member.)</p><p> </p><p>that was november 16th, 2020</p><p> </p><p>it's march 1st, 2021 and tommy was right.</p><p> </p><p>he flew to close to the sun, melting his wings and drowning.</p><p>the sun was dream, his wings being his mental heath, and the water being sorrow, anger and death.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. cuddling</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>place</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>more irl/modern-based and pure fucking fluff holy shit</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>it wasn't necessarily unknown knowledge tubbo has an aversion to touch.</p><p> </p><p>not because he was touch-starved, he just didn't like it.</p><p> </p><p>ranboo and tommy respected this. since they aren't y'know.</p><p> </p><p>dicks.</p><p> </p><p>however, there came a problem.</p><p> </p><p>tommy's love language was touch, and ranboo liked affection as much as the next guy.</p><p>(unless that next guy was tubbo of course)</p><p> and they all lived together, so they had to constantly remind themselves <em>not to touch tubbo as a form of affection.</em></p><p> </p><p>solution?</p><p> </p><p>cuddle with the person who likes touch to make up for the person who doesn't.</p><p> </p><p>and thus, pretty much every day at any time tommy and ranboo chilling on the couch to cuddle for hours at a time to bond, while usually on their phones watching youtube.</p><p>tommy naturally being the one that was being cuddled. height difference and all that.</p><p>(don't mention this to him however, he can and will beat you the fuck up with a pillow. tubbo's been through it enough to know from experience)</p><p> </p><p>and as a bonus, a very large amount of a deadpan tubbo, staring at the duo saying "what the fuck" seeming as they've been laying there for 3 fucking hours and refuse to move.</p><p> </p><p>hey, at least tubbo has piles upon piles of blackmail.</p><p> </p><p>(and free cuddles during the rare times he is actually up for affection)</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>cries bench trio/allium duo my beloved</p><p>also tysm for 20k hits &amp; 1k kudos what the fuck??? the fluff is your reward lmao</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0026"><h2>26. train</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>is</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>ghostbur typically doesn't feel hate. </p><p> </p><p>he'd say they're a rather positive ghost. looking at the good side of things, and trying to make other people happy as well.</p><p> </p><p>but ghostbur fucking hates this.</p><p> </p><p>and ghostbur fucking hates dream.</p><p> </p><p>things weren't supposed to turn out this way. dream was supposed to be dead, alivebur was supposed to stay dead and no one was supposed to be revived.</p><p> </p><p>it's all blue and black and red and he hates it so much because the blue's all wrong, and the red isn't tommy's red and the black was too dark and ghost feels like they could swim in it, and it feels so alone despite being surrounded by shadows of people an-</p><p> </p><p>yeah, he fucking hates everything here.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>i don't typically do notes but until I make a toc chapter i'll just keep this here.<br/>requests are open, but don't expect me to do all of them. i'll only do the ones that fit this book and inspire me :)</p><p>and yes i'm doing he/they/it/ghost for this chapter shush i like the headcanon and this book is very self-indulgent</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0027"><h2>27. memories</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>real</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i made this back in december so its outdated<br/>yikes</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"hey ghostbur?"</p><p>"yeah?"</p><p>"how- do you like being a ghost?"</p><p>"i mean. its okay. it's difficult to live with the burden of having done something terrible, but you get used to it over time. side effect of only remembering the good things i guess. would you like some blue?"</p><p>"yeah, thanks. that makes sense. how does the memories work? is it only good memories, does it depend, is it a game of luck or-"</p><p>"its a dangerous game of rng. some people remember the good times, others the bad times. some remember everything, others nothing. there's a rare chance you can learn more than when you did when you were alive. its like a roll of die, but with your memories. the thing you get is good luck depending on the way you interpret it. some don't want to remember the good times, because they know they've done something bad and they don't want those confusing feelings; some people do, just so they can live in blissful ignorance."</p><p>"huh. thats.. kinda fucked."</p><p>"i mean, its not really. sure its mostly rng but theres a bit of hope that you can get the thing you want. it's like in mario kart 8 where you're in fifth and you end up getting 3 mushrooms because the game is programmed that way. y'know the farther behind you get, the better the items."</p><p>"only you would compare the way death works to fucking <em>mario kart."</em></p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0028"><h2>28. time</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>you</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>an alternate ending to tommys new upload (5/7/2021) because I have no self control<br/>also double upload pog</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>after ninja had killed wilbur to get the stick to control time <em>(seriously a fucking stick?) </em>tommy had built as fast as he could considering the slowed time to get the stick so wilbur couldn't go batshit with his prophecies and whatever the fuck again. </p><p> </p><p>wilbur had returned from respawning, back to his normal self.</p><p>he didn't want the stick again.</p><p>good.</p><p> </p><p>after some short experimenting, if the stick is dropped or destroyed, then the speed it was last, would stay forever.</p><p>time to burn the little shit.</p><p>but...</p><p>he wasn't actually.</p><p> </p><p>the time stick had made tommy feel.. powerful. he felt in control like he could do anything and no one could stop him.</p><p>it was...</p><p>
  <em>amazing.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>so he made a quick, half-assed plan. </p><p>lure them to the nether and kill them all.</p><p> </p><p>so he searched for a small pit of lava, made the portal very quickly thanks to him sprinting, and went to the nether.</p><p> </p><p>they had made a pit for him to throw it in.</p><p>he acted like he threw it in. it was a normal stick.</p><p> </p><p>he grins towards them, pulls out his trusty diamond axe, and duo-wields the stick, and makes the time goes as fast as possible.</p><p> </p><p>"TIME FLIES WHEN YOU HAVING FUN!" rang through the air, followed by maniacal giggles from someone far too young to be under the wand's control.</p><p> </p><p>it was a bath of blood and anguished screaming. with a few burned bodies as well. </p><p> </p><p>it was a repeat of history, this time tommy being in wilbur's place.</p><p> </p><p>(wouldn't be the first time, despite it being a different universe entirely.)</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>kudos and comments make my day &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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